May 20, 2012
By FBOTU | Comment
May 20, 2012 at 1:23PM EDT
“I find one who hurt you. I kill. I good kitty.”
-Dex-Starr, Green Lantern #55
May 13, 2012
By FBOTU | Comment
May 13, 2012 at 9:12AM EDT
Damon: Now, I’m not halfway out of Virginia, and Elena sells our souls to the Originals?
Bonnie: It’s her call.
Damon: Know what else is her call? Everything bad ever.
-The Vampire Diaries, “The Departed”
May 6, 2012
By Chance | Comment
May 06, 2012 at 11:21PM EDT
“There was no way that I thought I was going to get the part, because the last line in the script said, ‘Princess Leia stands at the end of a long hallway, and she is staggeringly beautiful.’ And I crossed off the -ly and beautiful and felt more comfortable about my description.”
-Carrie Fisher
April 29, 2012
By Chance | Comment
April 29, 2012 at 2:32PM EDT
RuPaul: Drag is about creating a fantasy persona. It’s about getting to do all the things you’ve never done before, with no repercussions. Drag is like the morning after pill.
Rozy: What do you know about the morning after pill?
RuPaul: Honey, I am high as a kite on morning after pills right now.
-“Super Sisters,” RuPaul’s Drag U
April 22, 2012
By FBOTU | Comment
April 22, 2012 at 5:44PM EDT
“Technology isn’t intrinsically good or evil. It’s how it’s used. Like the death ray.”
-Professor Farnsworth, “That Darn Katz!”
April 15, 2012
By FBOTU | Comment
April 15, 2012 at 10:58AM EDT
“Heterosexuality is not normal; it’s just common.”
-Dorothy Parker
April 8, 2012
By FBOTU | Comment
April 08, 2012 at 10:57AM EDT
Dolores Umbridge: You applied first for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post, is that correct?
Severus Snape: Yes.
Dolores Umbridge: But you were unsuccessful?
Severus Snape: Obviously.
-Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
April 1, 2012
By Chance | Comment
April 01, 2012 at 1:11AM EDT
“When my fiancee and I decided to get married, it was because we knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together. And it breaks my heart to know that millions of gay Americans still can’t marry the one they love. And I can. That makes no sense.”
-Kristen Bell
March 25, 2012
By Chance | Comment
March 25, 2012 at 1:02AM EDT
“An experienced actor knows that the words ‘I love you’ are really a question.”
-Meryl Streep
March 18, 2012
By Chance | Comment
March 18, 2012 at 9:57AM EDT
Jeff: Do you even know what an analogy is?
Britta: It’s a a thought… with another thought’s hat on.
-Community, “Urban Matrimony and the Sandwich Arts”
March 11, 2012
By Chance | Comment
March 11, 2012 at 6:00AM EDT
Amy: That would be my boyfriend, happier playing his dopey Star Trek game with his friends than hanging out with me.
Penny: Star Wars. They get all cranky when you mix the two up.
Amy: What’s the difference?
Penny: There’s absolutely no difference.
-The Big Bang Theory, “The Weekend Vortex”
March 4, 2012
By Chance | Comment
March 04, 2012 at 10:34PM EDT
Zuko: You’re so beautiful when you hate the world.
Mai: I don’t hate you.
Zuko: I don’t hate you, too.
-Avatar: The Last Airbender, “The Headband”
February 26, 2012
By Chance | Comment
February 27, 2012 at 10:33AM EDT
Lisa: (From the Screamapillar pamphlet) “Without constant reassurance, it will die. It’s sexually attracted to fire.”
Homer: Are you sure God doesn’t want it to be dead?
-The Simpsons, “The Frying Game”
February 19, 2012
By Chance | Comment
February 19, 2012 at 1:00PM EDT
“They bump you, and when you stop, they mutilate you and then take your car.”
-Ed Coplin (George Segal), Flirting with Disaster
February 12, 2012
By Chance | Comment
February 18, 2012 at 8:43PM EDT
Dean: So, what are you saying, that Dad was disappointed in you?
Sam: Was? Is. Always has been.
Dean: Why would you think that?
Sam: Because, I didn’t want to bow-hunt. Or hustle pool. Because I wanted to go to school and live my life, which in our whacked-out family made me the freak.
Dean: Yeah, you were kinda like the blonde chick in The Munsters!
-Supernatural, “Bugs”
February 5, 2012
By Chance | Comment
February 07, 2012 at 1:06AM EDT
“Happiness. Happ-i-ness. Ha-penis. Penis. I did it! Ovaries. Uvula. Uterus. VAAAGINA!”
-Peggy Hill, “Square Peg,” King of the Hill
