Quote of the Week: What’s the Point of Living?

By Chance

November 08, 2009 at 7:00PM EDT

Did you know that you can submit a quote for consideration for Quote of the Week? It’s true! There’s a submission link right up there under the Quote of the Week title. And do you know what else? Someone submitted one! And I’ve chosen it to be this week’s quote! Site member Razz-Bel submitted this offering from the beautiful and bizarre Donnie Darko. Donnie (Jake Gyllenhaal) tries to educate his friends on the basics of Smurf history and sexuality:

“First of all, Papa Smurf didn’t create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel’s evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village. But the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario, it just couldn’t happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don’t even have reproductive organs under those little white pants. That’s what’s so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. What’s the point of living if you don’t have a dick?”
-Donnie Darko

Now, let’s hear from Razz-Bel himself:

“Yes, it’s kind of a long quote, but I love it because many a fanboy has found himself in this situation. You overhear some ill-informed person talking about a pop icon you love, and this person has the history all wrong. And as a fanboy, it irritates the crap out of you! When you can’t take anymore, you automatically open your mouth and these words just flow out. When you’re done, you get a blank stare from the ill-informed person and he responds something like, ‘Damn it, Donnie. Why do you gotta get so smart on us?’ Like you’re the one in the wrong.”

Thanks for the submission, Razz. This scenario happens to me all the time, and usually ends with me saying something like, “Really? You want to fight with me over Star Wars? Bring it!” Since I chose your quote, you’ll be getting something out of the FBOTU Prize Closet! Don’t get too excited, though. It could just be lint. Roll the clip!