When last we left our space- and time-traveling heroes, Amy was dying, Rory was mourning, River was exploding and the bad guys were locking the Doctor up inside the Pandorica. “The Big Bang” begins as the series began: with little Amelia Pond. We see an alternate version of events, where the Doctor never came to visit, yet still haunts the subconscious and artwork of our young protagonist.

In many ways, the adult Amy Pond doesn’t seem like a logical extension of Amelia Pond at all. We are supposed to believe that the quiet and lonely little girl with the imaginary friend somehow grew up to be the extroverted, tough-talking adventurer we see now. Where is that little girl who was so worried about the crack in her wall? When Amelia and Amy eventually meet, face to face, the disconnect is even more obvious. The little girl isn’t brassy enough to be the young Amy. And Amy isn’t haunted enough to be the adult Amelia. It’s a conundrum and probably best not to think about too much.

Amelia encounters and opens the Pandorica, but the Doctor is not inside. Surprise! It’s Amy. “Okay, kid. This is where it gets complicated,” she warns Amelia, and boy does it. The rest of the episode employs enough wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey tricks to make Tennant blush. But at the heart of this episode is the heart. The finale (and the whole series, really) has been about love. Rory’s love for Amy. Amy’s undiscovered love for Rory. River’s love for the Doctor. The Doctor’s love for humanity. Believe it or not, all that love is vastly more complicated than the timey-wimey stuff. When the Doctor scolds, it hurts, because he loves us and we love him. When Rory refuses to leave Amy, though it will mean thousands of years of duty, it’s heartbreaking, because he loves her so much. And River…River gets more and more complicated as we go along. We can assume that her relationship with the Doctor becomes deeper in some future time, and yet, it comes with a dire warning, too.

How the Doctor manages to save the universe again is somewhat less crucial this time around than how his human counterparts save themselves and each other. In that respect, this episode belongs more to Rory than to Amy or the Doctor.

And speaking of the Doctor, Matt Smith had ridiculously large shoes to fill by taking on the role from David Tennant. I must say he’s done a splendid job, imbuing the character with just the right balance of charm, eccentricity and arrogance. If I don’t have warm and fuzzy feelings for him, I think that’s by his own design. This Doctor is more aloof, more stern, with a quicker temper. In fact, he reminds me of an ex, who liked the idea of a relationship with humans, but just didn’t know how to connect or interact beyond the role of greatly amused observer. It’s a good place for a character to start, though, and I look forward to more years and adventures with the 11th Doctor.

But, really, Steven Moffat? Space Florida?

I’ve had a couple of days now to recover from Comic-Con, so I can write coherently about the whole experience. Any attempts at writing yesterday just resulted in my face pressed against the cool, cool keys of my keyboard. I was ridiculously tired after the whole show was said and done. I’ve never smiled and pretended to be nice for five days in a row. It takes a lot out of a person. But that’s just one of the things I learned this year. Here are a few more.

1. FBOTU Site Members are Awesome
Meeting site members truly was the highlight of the con. I missed a lot of programming by stationing myself at a booth all day, but I wouldn’t have missed meeting you guys for anything. I also want to give a shout-out to all the lurkers I met over the weekend. Thanks for not just lurking around the booth. I’m glad you said hi! Now, feel free to say hi on the site, too!

2. Gay Comic Book Creators Are Hot
At one point, I looked around and found myself surrounded by Justin Hall, Ed Luce, Sean-Z and Dave Davenport. It’s too much hotness for one con, let alone one booth. I had to go buy an $8 cup of ice just to cool down a little bit.

3. Help Wanted: Minions
Since I was denied pre-sale bounty from Mattel, I wasn’t looking forward to standing in line, getting a ticket, dealing with surly Mattel workers and disgruntled toy collectors. But then I found someone to go do all that for me. If you can bring minions to Comic-Con (or find them there), I highly recommend it.

4. Gail Simone Is Not Really My Friend
I’ve spent the past month or two replying to Gail Simone’s Tweets as if I know her. I do not. When I got the chance to meet her at the Con, I introduced myself as if she knows me. She does not. Plus, I carried my Wonder Woman book around every day except the day I actually met her. That day, of course, I left it at the hotel. I think it’s time to cut my losses and transfer my stalking talents to Daniel Way. Does he have a Twitter account?

5. Sometimes…Homophobia Is Good
At WonderCon, I learned that kids and teenage girls love free buttons, especially if there’s a rainbow involved. Neither of those groups are in the demographic for this website, though. I knew I had to do something at Comic-Con to make sure folks knew the free buttons have rules and restrictions attached. So I used my newfangled iPad as a very expensive sign, alerting people that the rainbow geek buttons = super gay. Worked like a charm. People would run towards the pile of buttons, see the sign, then run away, leaving plenty for the homos. Yay homophobia!

6. The Pen is Mightier Than the Cosplay Sword
You might have heard by now that there was a minor altercation in one of the halls, and one attendee jabbed another in or around the eye with a pen. When the rumors first spread, all we heard was that someone in a Harry Potter shirt stabbed someone else. My first question: “With what? A wand?” It’s a sad turn of events that will probably bring some sort of overreaction next year (bag searches, metal detectors, pen confiscation). Just the day before, though, I was seriously considering stabbing the woman sitting next to me in the DC panel, who would not stop answering her phone. I thought, if I brain her with a rock, would anyone care? No, no they would not. So, I sympathize with Harry Stabber.

7. Why Are You Here?
I know there’s nothing more top secret than a comic book, TV or movie storyline. While classified military documents find their way online all the time, forget trying to find out who Batgirl is going to fight next. Because of this level of security, a lot of panels consist of top comics and Hollywood talent sitting at a table, repeating “I can’t talk about that” over and over again. It doesn’t make for a very dynamic panel discussion. I suppose you could argue that fans should learn not to ask or talk about the future of their favorite characters. Then…what’s the point? You’re burdened by a lot of confidential information and an ironclad non-disclosure agreement, so blink once if Dick Grayson is going to die or twice if he and Conner Kent get married and raise Damian as their own. Is that so hard?

8. Slash and Burn
I should be allowed to walk around at the end of the con, with a tube of lipstick (a la Pearl Harbor), and put an X on the forehead of anyone who’s not going to make it to the next one. That sounds way harsh, and “popular arts” has a very broad definition, but come on. Come on! If your stuff has nothing to do with comics, movies, TV, gaming, toys, subculture, counterculture, science fiction, fantasy, robots, vampires, robot vampires, Prince Adam, Yak Face, Rayne Sommers, Dolph Lundgren’s penis, Monchichis, 1983, Veronica Lodge, Benji, Zax, the Alien Prince, Norville Rogers or Alasdair Gillis, then it doesn’t belong. That’s a pretty wide and inclusive list, I think. But if that’s not you, let someone else have the frakkin’ table. Thank you. 

9. Olivia Munn Is Not Funny

10. All We Want Is Life Beyond the Thunderdome
Isolated stabbings and lack of cell phone etiquette aside, I’m always very pleased by the level of kindness and humanity on display at the con. Things get crazy and intense and weird, but for the most part, people really hold it together, proving that years of reading comics and watching He-Man have paid off. Geeks are nice. And friendly. And well-endowed. And I forgot what I was saying.

I’d also like to take a moment here and thank Prism Comics for having FBOTU at their booth. They are an amazing and inspiring organization, and they couldn’t have been more supportive or generous to us. They are a non-profit organization that exists solely to support gay comic book creators and readers. If you’ve never had a chance to visit them at a con, please check out their website. There’s so much good stuff there, your head will explode. I’d also like to thank FBOTMs Rafael and Paul, who were charming and delightful every step of the way. Finally, a big thanks to everyone who stopped by to say hi, introduce themselves and talk about the site. Thank you, one and all! See you next year!

Did you attend Comic-Con? What did you learn? Feel free to share your thoughts with us in the comments section below! 

Film: Salt
Starring: Angelina Jolie, Liev Schreiber, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Daniel Olbrychski, August Diehl
Written By: Kurt Wimmer
Directed By: Phillip Noyce
Genre: Action, thriller, chicks-kick-ass
Rating: 7 out of 10 / B
Reviewed By: Johnny M

It’s summer, and that means actions and thrills at the cinema, which most films convey by staging as many loud explosions per minute as they possibly can while the stoic, beefy male lead walks away unharmed (preferably in slo-mo). We’re also in the middle of a 3D craze, a painfully ubiquitous fad that seems designed more often than not as a cash grab by greedy studios. What a relief, then, that a summer film comes along that is judicious on the explosions, is filmed in glorious 2D, and has a strong female character at its center: Salt, or as it’s probably known in other parts of the world, Angelina Jolie Will Kick Everybody’s Asses.

(WARNING: POTENTIAL MILD SPOILERS AHEAD)

Evelyn Salt (Angelina Jolie) is a veteran CIA officer with a fairly easy life. She’s respected at her job and has a loving husband (August Diehl) at home. All of this is upended when a Russian defector (Daniel Olbrychski) appears in her office and accuses Salt of being a Russian sleeper agent whose mission is to spark an international incident by killing Russia’s president on American soil. Desperate to clear her name and protect her husband, Salt must race against time to find out who’s trying to set her up while evading the feds, including her partner Ted (Liev Schreiber) who isn’t sure if Salt is innocent or not, and Agent Peabody (Chiwetel Ejiofor), who definitely believes she’s the enemy.

The film comes off as a chimerical cross of Run Lola Run, Ultraviolet and a Tom Clancy film and with good reason: it was written by Ultraviolet‘s Kurt Wimmer and directed by Phillip Noyce, who gave us Harrison Ford as Jack Ryan in both Patriot Games and Clear and Present Danger. For certain, it’s got a distinctly retro vibe to it: the Russians haven’t been used as reliable bogeymen for years, although the Cold War revivalism isn’t as arbitrary as the trailers and reviews make it out to be. Noyce and Wimmer do a good job of balancing action film nostalgia with modern action film sensibilities: the Bourne shaky-cam shows up a number of times, and the film barrels down a logic-free plot track with confidence and an almost admirable lack of irony.

No matter how ridiculous the film gets (and it does get rather ridiculous by the end) it’s held together by Angelina Jolie, a task almost no other actor could do. Few female actors possess such kinetic potential as Jolie, except for perhaps Milla Jovovich or Michelle Yeoh, and even fewer actors (of any gender) hold so much raw, magnetic charisma. As in the similar whirly-gig guns-and-flip-kicks Wanted, Jolie is a hypnotic, magnetic presence that makes even the most implausible developments seem perfectly reasonable. Salt was originally a man named Edwin, written for Tom Cruise. When he turned it down, Salt got a sex change and Jolie took the role…and thank goodness for that. Jolie can express volumes of information with a single raised eyebrow or a nearly imperceptible purse of the lips while Tom Cruise expresses human emotion and motivation as if he read it out of a book poorly translated from the original German. 

Salt as a woman is a much more dynamic force than Salt as a man, even if there’s almost no distinction made against her because of it. Evelyn Salt is a one-woman army, demolition crew, and strike force rolled into one that’s awesome to behold, similar again to the eponymous heroine in Wimmer’s Ultraviolet. Just like that character, her true motivations are not always clear or laid out. Wimmer and Noyce do an excellent job of withholding the information the audience needs to make up their minds. It’s never clear until the absolute final scenes what side Salt is on, and every time a piece of evidence sways you one way or the other, something else happens to make you reshuffle the information in your head. The flashbacks to Salt’s childhood and relationship with her husband are left intentionally vague, and the information is just enough to let you fill in a gap, forcing you to figure it out on your own.

Not everything is as sweet in the film, though. While it proceeds at a breakneck pace during the action scenes, there are a number of times when the film slows down, almost threatening to kill the built-up momentum (and the first act starts out very slow). In addition, while Jolie is brilliant, her supporting cast is a mixed bag. Pairing a force of nature like Jolie with the uncommonly handsome and soft-spoken Diehl is great, but Diehl resorts too much to a puppy dog gaze when he looks at the camera. Similarly, Liev Schreiber is playing the Liev Schrebier character, a task he learned well at the Duchovny School of Monochrome Acting. Chiwetel Ejiofor is a more active, more interesting focus for sure, but he isn’t given enough to do (and he never gets to show off the true extent of his skills like he did in Serenity). Finally, the film hinges on a final act reveal that you’ll either find perfectly acceptable in the hyperactive, comic book world of the film or that you’ll find completely ridiculous and arbitrary. Of course, you may think both of these things are true (and they probably are in equal measures). It all depends on how you surrender to the film’s internal logic.

And surrender is the proper option when it comes to Salt. The film never aims to be lofty or highbrow, and it never seeks to make any deep or salient points on modern times (although there are some there about the nature of conflict and identity). Instead, it’s a speeding amusement park ride of a movie, designed to make your pulse race and your knuckles whiten. The ending is a blatant set-up for a franchise, and here’s hoping that the next outing is even better. “Who is Salt?” asks the marketing posters. Even by the end of the film, you’re still not sure, but it’s a credit to everyone involved when you find yourself dying to find out.

For me, cons aren’t just about toys and comics and sharing a blissful elevator ride with Patrick Wharburton. No, these crazy things are also about seeing old friends, meeting new people and learning about what passions drive other geeks to wait in line for an autograph or pull on a pair of tights. The people aspect is extremely fun, and I’ve had a blast geeking out with my fellow fanboys (and fangirls!). So, while I’m exhausted and my poor feet may never recover from this ordeal, I’m a little sorry to see it end. But it ain’t over yet, kids. Here’s my schedule for Sunday:

10:30 - 12:00 Queer Comics Panel
1:00 - 5:00 FBOTU @ Prism Comics Booth (#2049)
2:00 - 4:00 Meet Fanboy of the Month/Gay Comic Geek Paul at the Prism Booth!
5:00 Collapse

Now, for my recap of Saturday, where do I begin? Really, the whole day was about FBOTM Rafael. Months ago, Rafael and I had joked about him being a booth babe should I ever get a spot to exhibit at Comic-Con. So, when it actually came to fruition, I contacted Raf, with fingers crossed, hoping he was a little serious about being eye candy for 150,000 passersby. Luckily, he was all for it. We met in my hotel room Saturday morning for him to try on a couple of costumes. We decided on Nightwing over Superman and headed to the show. I spent a large part of the morning doing some shopping and avoiding the crush around the panel rooms. I was pretty shocked I was able to walk right up to the BBC America booth to get my Doctor/Dalek set. I kept looking around to see if I’d somehow accidentally cut in line, which I’m known to do. With a little time to kill before heading to the Prism Comics booth, I went upstairs to the autograph area to look around and check out people in costume. That’s where I first encountered Hawkman (or Hawkbulge, as I called him). Saturday night is the annual masquerade, so it’s often the best day to see costumes. And certainly the best day to see men in tights.

I’ve been going to this panel for several years now, and it’s amazing to actually see the progress that’s been made in terms of adding LGBT characters to mainstream comics. I still believe that adding Kevin Keller to Archie is revolutionary in a way that will affect the lives of LGBT kids for years to come. Luckily, Dan Parent assured the audience this wasn’t planned to be a one-time thing. Kevin is here to stay. His description of his daughters and their friends and how accepting they are was really inspirational and gave me some hope for the future. Marjorie M. Liu and Daniel Way are people I just want to hang out with. Intelligent, well-spoken and insanely talented, they were probably my favorite part of the panel. Both spoke very eloquently and honestly about writing a bisexual character who is defined more by his actions than his sexuality. And for the record, Daken is pronounced Dock-en. I’ve been saying Dack-en. I’m glad that’s all cleared up now. I didn’t expect Geoff Johns to say much. Since ascending to the throne, his new responsibilities seem to be looking cute and repeating “I can’t talk about that” over and over again. He did give some slight hints that we might be seeing Pied Piper again, as well as maybe, sort of, possibly a male Star Sapphire and a new gay character in the Green Lantern title somewhere.

Finally, I’ve learned so much about Howard Cruse at the Con this year and his impact on gay comics. While fans always tend to be looking forward, it’s also a good idea to look back and see just how far we’ve come and recognize the people who paved the way.

I couldn’t stay very long for the mixer following the panel, but I did get to say hi to a few people. And Rafael helped me do a little FBOTM recruiting. If we really get one of the guys we talked to, you’re all going to freak out. But I can’t talk about that right now. It’s been a good weekend, overall, in terms of signing up our next FBOTMs. We have four potentials now, waiting in the wings, ready for the spotlight. Unfortunately, Geoff Johns declined, but there’s always next year. 

Don’t forget! March Fanboy of the Month Rafael will be making an appearance at the Prism booth at 3:00PM today! So, stop by, say hi and take some pics. It’ll be fun! Here’s our booth schedule, etc. for today:

2:00 - 5:30 FBOTU @ Prism Comics
3:00 - 5:00 Meet March Fanboy of the Month Rafael!
5:45 - 7:15 Gays in Comics Panel
7:15 - 8:15 Gays in Comics Mixer

Now, let’s talk about Friday. I was at the booth for much of the morning and met and chatted with some great people. I’m beginning to recognize when people are a little timid about approaching the “gay booth.” I found that if you just smile, wave them over and ask them about their day, they loosen up a little and dive right in. It’s really rewarding to see so many LGBT teenagers around, too. I really could have stood around and chatted all day, but there were a couple of panels I just had to attend.

First up was the Mattel panel. I went into the room a bit early and caught the end of an Archie panel. They introduced the creator of Kevin Keller, and I expected some sort of reaction from the audience, but...nothing. So, either Archie readers are just naturally really polite, or it’s a total non-issue. Either way, I’m glad no one booed. People seem more concerned about Archie doing a parody of Jersey Shore than the whole gay thing. I couldn’t agree more. Once the Archies cleared out, it was time for Mattel. I think, perhaps, I’m just getting old and cranky. I was fully expecting the audience to stand up and take Mattel to task for the problems with online ordering, the insanity of having only one sale day (or sale minute, really) a month and the lousy costumer service. But no, everyone sang Mattel’s praises and said, “Don’t ever change.” It’s really a bizarre and abusive relationship they’ve got going there. Anyway, they introduced the upcoming toys and took a few tame questions, then it was all over. They are a really strange company. But the new Bow is way cool.

I then decided I’d better check in with DC and see what nuttiness they have in store. And for the second time that day, I felt old and cranky. Dan DiDio (doing his best PT Barnum impersonation) asked the crowd how they liked the new Wonder Woman costume. The crowd went nuts! I felt like I was in Bizarro World or something. So, clearly, those of us who aren’t so much against a costume change as we are against a bad costume change are in the minority. One brave gay took the mic and demanded better treatment of Donna Troy and Cassie and expressed distaste for this new Wonder Woman storyline. Dan and the panel basically said to give it time; making Wonder Woman popular was more important than Donna and Cassie; and sit down. This, of course, came after Grant Morrison called the Joel Schumacher Batman costumes “fruity.” So I wasn’t feeling a lot of love for the gays in the DC Nation. If the crowd cheers the new costume in the “Gays in Comics” panel today, I think I’ll just go home. Geoff Johns did make a big announcement about a new Flash title coming in 2011, featuring Wally and Bart. So, that’s something to look forward to.

From the DC panel, I headed straight to the Being Human panel, which I feared I might be too late for. Luckily, I got there just in time to get in and get a seat. This was the perfect way to end the day. The moderator was dreadful, though. I don’t know why they keep dragging out these incoherent entertainment journalists to moderate panels. They really need to get some fans to do it. Toby Whithouse (creator/writer), Lenora Crichlow (Annie), Sinead Keenan (Nina), Aidan Turner (Mitchell) and, of course, Russell Tovey (George) were all present, charming and well-spoken. They all seemed to really like each other, and had great respect for the fans (up to a point). I think they were a bit short with some of the fans who weren’t very good at expressing themselves, but I can imagine it gets tiring dealing with fans, especially when they can’t seem to get to a point. There was no mention of Russell’s sexuality at all, though I really can’t think of a good time they could have brought it up. He did address rumors of being in a new season of Torchwood, though. He said he knows nothing and has never even watched Torchwood, but would be open to the idea. Most of the discussion centered on the second season. Apparently, Sinead didn’t believe the majority of the audience would illegally download the season. Russell told her that not only would they download it, but they’d be proud of it. The audience cheered this, of course, then a fan pointed out that they’d be less likely to download the show if it didn’t take seven months to get it here. This all left me feeling like a bit of a nerd, since I haven’t downloaded the second series and will be watching it as it airs on BBC America starting this week. Then, I snapped a picture of Russell and he looked at me with an expression that can only be described as “love at first sight.” Check it out.

9:30 - 2:00 FBOTU @ Prism Comics
1:00 - 2:00 Bloom County‘s Berkeley Breathed: The Secret Sex Tapes
1:00 - 2:00 Some Matty Crap
1:45 - 2:45 Batman: The Return
3:00 - 4:00 Superman: Man of Tomorrow
5:00 - 6:00 Spotlight on Drew Struzan
6:00 - 7:00 BBC America’s Being Human
8:00 - 10:00 Batman: Under the Red Hood
9:00 - 10:00 Worst Cartoons Ever

Now, let’s talk about Thursday. My marketing team did some field research and found that most people find me to be “cold” and “unapproachable” and that the size of my head is “freakish” and “not right.” To improve my likability and minimize my lower-ranking qualities, the team decided I should...wear a hat. They promised this would camouflage the head problem and give me the appearance of being “just one of the guys” or “someone I want to have a beer with.” So, off to the milliner I went to secure a hat. I chose a simple Superman design, resisted the rhinestone version and decided against the Batman because of his less-than-friendly personality. No one wants to have a beer with Batman. (Well, I do. But not beer. Maybe tequila shots.) Why am I telling you all this, essentially drawing back the curtains here at FBOTU, Inc.? Because...I think it worked.

I had such a good time on Thursday, meeting and interacting with the crowds. People were very friendly, talkative, and absolutely no one maced me. I got to meet several site members, plus lots of fun and friendly gay geeks. Plus, I met three potential new contributors to the site, which is very exciting. But it wasn’t all just site business and magic hats. No, I also managed to hit a few panels. Starting off the day, I dropped in on the “Divas and Golden Lassoes” panel, which I couldn’t remember the name of, so I kept telling people it was the “Why Gays Like Wonder Woman” panel. The consensus? ‘Cause she’s fabulous. It was a fun discussion, but I had a very hard time paying attention, since I kept imagining panelists Phil Jimenez and Marc Andreyko making out. Really, they shouldn’t have been allowed to sit next to each other. It was too distracting to the audience.

After the big Wonder Woman revelation, I went to the Caprica/Battlestar panel, which was really the “Bear McCreary Fan Club” panel. I started playing on my iPad and planning my escape when a guy got up and revealed that he played some BSG music at his son’s funeral. It was a really unexpected and powerful moment, and Bear was clearly moved by it. It proves a couple of things, I think. First, you never know what might happen in a panel. And second, these shows or comics or movies or whatever have very real impact on the lives of their fans. And because I tend to be morbid, I started thinking about what music I’d want at my funeral. (Which might contribute to that whole “cold” and “unapproachable” thing.) I think I’ve decided on “Princess Leia’s Theme,” which has always been my favorite piece of Star Wars music. Then, my second choice would probably be “Rainbow Connection.”

I skipped out of the booth early to attend the “Writing Queer” panel, since three of my favorite writers were speaking: Gail Simone, Greg Rucka and Judd Winick. Rucka told a great story about interviewing Lt. Dan Choi and how his story influenced Batwoman. Gail summed things up nicely, by simply stating that adding gay characters to any story about the human condition is just the right thing to do. I resisted the urge to follow Gail around the rest of the evening and went, instead, to the “Why Is Batman Crazy?” panel. The material was pretty clinical, and I thought for sure the good doctors were losing the audience, but people were really into it and asked some great questions about psychology, trauma and what makes a supervillain. Turns out I exhibit 9 out of 10 warning signs for supervillainy. And not just regular supervillainy, but cartoonish supervillainy. So, you know, stay tuned for a list of my demands.

I’m sad that I couldn’t get into the Being Human and Doctor Who screenings. Those would have been fun to see with a Comic-Con crowd, but there was no way I could spare two hours or more to stand in line. So, I’ll be watching those at another time.

My thanks to everyone who stopped by the booth to say hi and keep me company. Be sure to follow my exploits on Twitter, Facebook and Foursquare. See you at the con!

Remember, Fanboys of the Universe will be at the Prism Comics booth from 2:00PM to 7:00PM, so please stop by, say hi, get some swag and tell me all about your Comic-Con experience! I got to walk around a little bit during Preview Night, and have to say the crowd was nowhere near as insane as last year. Moving around last year on Preview Night was next to impossible. I’m curious to see if the crowds are lighter throughout the weekend, or if attendees were just forgoing Preview Night to save money.

There are a few changes. Namely, Artist Alley has been reconfigured and is actually WELL LIT for the first time in Comic-Con history! I’m very pleased with this change, and I imagine the artists are loving it, too. Be sure to spend some time there. It’s always my favorite part of the show. The other big surprise this year is the vertical growth of some of the booths. It’s very reminiscent of E3 now, with two-story booths, with penthouses for entertaining. It’s all fun and games until the Twilight booth collapses under the weight of a thousand screaming tweens. Tragic.

Now, here’s my schedule for Thursday. Be sure to let us know what you’re up to!

10:00 - 11:00 Tron Press Conference
10:30 - 11:30 Divas and Golden Lassoes: The LGBT Obsession with Super Heroines
12:00 - 1:00 Caprica, Battlestar and Beyond
2:00 - 7:00 FBOTU @ Prism Comics
7:30 - 8:30 Transcending Trauma: From the Birth of Batman to the Rise of the Red Hood
8:00 - 11:00 BBC America US Premiere Screenings: Doctor Who and Being Human
11:00 - 2:00 Drinking

Have a great day! Be sure to follow my exploits on Twitter, Facebook and Foursquare. 

The Load is short, but sweet this week, as I prepare for our big splash at Comic-Con. Be sure to stop by the Prism Comics booth and let me know what you’re reading, what you’re recommending or if you’ve finally kicked that China Cat habit of yours. See you there! Now, on with the Load:

The Amazing Spider-Man #637 I know the book is called Spider-Man, but seriously, enough with the spiders. It’s totally grossing me out. On a lighter note, isn’t it interesting that when Peter shuts the hell up for five minutes, he’s actually a total badass. Just like his aunt.

Batgirl #12 Well, I totally got the Wendy thing wrong. I thought for sure she’d be the evil version of Oracle by now. Of course, it could still happen. They didn’t show us what happened to Marvin’s corpse, did they? Here’s hoping Wendy’s got him propped up in her apartment somewhere, maybe next to the ficus.

Birds of Prey #3 I’m going out on a limb here and guess that White Canary is actually some multiverse version of Dinah. Or maybe an undead future version of Lian, back to seek revenge on all the jerks who were too busy to save her life. Yes, that’s probably it.

Justice Leage: Generation Lost #5 Oh, Maxwell Lord. You are so lucky Wonder Woman is a surly teen in a Casual Corner clearance costume now. Otherwise, she would snap your bitch-ass neck like a twig.

Superman #701 I’m loving Superman’s walk-about. It’s actually very emotional and thought-provoking, reminding him (and us) what it means to be a hero. Thankfully, I’m too selfish and shallow to ever have such a burden.

The Unwritten #15 Can you think of anything worse than being stuck in a Dickens novel for the rest of your life? I would pray to Jebus for death. Speaking of death, just when I thought we might have a recurring gay character, guess what? Yup. Dead. That totally sucks, but at least he’s not stuck in a Dickens novel.

That’s it for this week, kids! Happy reading! See you at Comic-Con!

I must admit that moments after I bought the iPad on Saturday, I experienced a nauseating wave of buyer’s remorse. There was really no pressing need for me to have it. I’ve gotten by without it all these months since its release. The main reason I picked it up is because I was playing with one in the store and decided to see how Fanboys of the Universe looked on it. (FYI, the Apple Store and Best Buy both just love it when you have FBOTU running on all of their display models.) Then I reasoned that displaying the site on an iPad at Comic-Con was somehow more magical and futuristic than using my netbook (which was magical and futuristic last year, but looks terribly dated now). As I carried my purchase from the store to my car, I immediately began chastising myself. “There is absolutely no reason for me to have this.” In fact, I left it in the box and over to one side of my desk much of the weekend, while I entertained thoughts of taking it back. Then...then I missed Doctor Who.

Truly, I got a little giggly as I watched, not quite believing I was watching the Doctor on a tablet right out of science fiction or The Jetsons. I suppose I could have watched it on my iPod, yet the size of the iPad makes all the difference. Somehow, the device feels infinitely advanced, yet uncommonly personal. The Doctor says, “Never ignore coincidence.” So, it’s no mere coincidence, I think, that Doctor Who has very similar qualities. Good sci-fi not only shows you a technologically advanced future or worlds beyond the imagination, but it also makes such flights of fancy real and personal to its audience. So, while I haven’t been 100% on board this season, I must say Steven Moffat and company have crafted a deeply emotional and satisfying episode. River Song returns to deliver a dire warning to the Doctor, and she’s not alone. Joining her, in cameo appearances, are pivotal characters from throughout the season, tying all the previous adventures together extremely well.

River, played to such sexy and confident perfection by Alex Kingston, has become one of my favorite characters, due in no small part to the fact that she serves as the only connection to the previous series. She has gone adventuring with Tennant, and that gives her great credibility here. As for Amy, my concerns that she’s “Donna-Lite” are largely unfounded. In many ways, she is much more a creation of the Doctor than any previous companion. He shaped her childhood, her psyche, her relationship with the world and other men. As we head into the finale, she is quite literally the center of his universe and he is hers. I do care about her. And while I still think she’s terribly bad at pretending to fall around the TARDIS, I can overlook that, because, ultimately, I hope she finds happiness and what she’s really looking for, which isn’t Rory or the Doctor, but herself.

I will most likely be watching the finale at Comic-Con with a thousand other people and not on my iPad. At first, anyway. I’m sure I’ll watch and re-watch it on my little friend, though. And if people get tired of my hawking FBOTU at Comic-Con, I’ll just hold up my tablet, press play and satisfy the masses with a rousing speech from the Doctor:

“Come on, look at me! No plan, no back up, no weapons worth a damn. Oh, and something else: I don’t have anything to lose! So, if you’re sitting up there in your silly little space ships with all your silly little guns, and you’ve got any plans on taking the Pandorica tonight, just remember who’s standing in your way! Remember every black day I ever stopped you, and then, and then, do the smart thing! Let somebody else try first.”
-Doctor Who, “The Pandorica Opens”

Magical. 

For several years now, and especially since starting Fanboys of the Universe, Comic-Con has practically grown to full-on holiday status. It’s like the new Christmas, which is odd, because I always described Halloween as the new Christmas. Which leaves Christmas feeling more and more like a moderately festive Arbor Day. Calendar confusion aside, Comic-Con is less than a week away; I’ve put out cookies for the Con Fairy; and I’ve been busy gathering FBOTMs to hang out at our booth at the show. Unfortunately, July Fanboy of the Month Joseph will not be there. It would have made perfect sense to have him there, since he’s this month’s FBOTM and all, but we’ll have to try again next year.

However, we do have March 2009 FBOTM Rafael and August 2008 FBOTM Paul (aka the Gay Comic Geek) stopping by to meet people, pose for pictures and spread the word about Fanboys of the Universe. If you’re going to Comic-Con, be sure to follow FBOTU on Twitter. That’s primarily how we’ll be making announcements, sharing news and giving stuff away. Don’t miss out, kids. Sign up today! Now, on with the good stuff:

• Get your free desktop calendar, featuring July FBOTM Joseph, on the Downloads page.
• Check out the latest photos from Joseph’s shoot in the Gallery.
• Learn all about Joseph and what turns him on in the FBOTM Lounge.
• Watch Joseph’s behind-the-scenes video in the FBOTM Lounge or on the FBOTU YouTube page.

By the way, because of Comic-Con, there will be no FBOTM Friday next week. (Aw, sad face.) Not to worry, Joseph will be back the following Friday in all his glory. Brush up on your Comic-Con carols and have a great weekend!

Check out some of their other videos here, especially the Ghostbusters in the New York Public Library.

“We have made the decision to not bring Ed Norton back to portray the title role of Bruce Banner in The Avengers. Our decision is definitely not one based on monetary factors, but instead rooted in the need for an actor who embodies the creativity and collaborative spirit of our other talented cast members. The Avengers demands players who thrive working as part of an ensemble, as evidenced by Robert, Chris H, Chris E, Sam, Scarlett and all of our talented casts. We are looking to announce a name actor who fulfills these requirements, and is passionate about the iconic role in the coming weeks.”

Meow! In cat fight terms, that was Marvel taking her earrings off. Be warned, though. If you’ve ever bitch slapped a William Morris agent, you know what’s coming. In a response that practically screamed, “Who do these comic book kids think they are!” Brian Swardstrom, Edward’s agent, responded:

“This offensive statement from Kevin Feige at Marvel is a purposefully misleading, inappropriate attempt to paint our client in a negative light…We know a lot of fans have voiced their public disappointment with this result, but this is no excuse for Feige’s mean-spirited, accusatory comments. Counter to what Kevin implies here, Edward was looking forward to the opportunity to work with Joss and the other actors in the Avengers cast, many of whom are personal friends of his. Feige’s statement is unprofessional, disingenuous and clearly defamatory. Mr. Norton’s talent, tireless work ethic and professional integrity deserve more respect, and so do Marvel’s fans.”

Grr! Agent smash! Well, the earrings are off and drinks have been thrown! If you’re like me, you popped some popcorn, got comfortable and waited for Marvel’s bucket of crazy to spill forth. I imagined Kevin Feige releasing some surveillance footage of Edward Norton punching orphans. Alas, the (seemingly) final word on the matter came from the former Mr. Banner himself. Posted as a screen capture (of all things!) on his Facebook page, Edward adopted his best “aw shucks” demeanor and said:

Before I pat Edward on the back and send him a basket of muffins, I’d like to take a closer look at the anatomy of this mini-scandal. Who knows what actually happened in negotiations? But not knowing has never stopped me before, so I imagine Marvel proposed a pay cut and had probably already promised top billing to RDJ. Edward, of course, wasn’t going to accept that, but Marvel didn’t want to look any jerkier (or cheaper) than they already do. So, to save face, they released their nasty statement, placing the blame on Edward for not being a team player. Edward, of course, didn’t want to look jerky, either, and nothing would make him look jerkier than responding in rant form to Marvel’s dismissal. So, why do you pay your agent 20%? Oh yeah, so he’ll blast the bully and look like the hothead, leaving you the chance to come in at the end, calm and cool, looking like Audrey Hepburn while Joan and Linda are scratching each other’s eyes out. 

So, what does it all mean? Well, Marvel still looks kind of jerky, but it’s nicely balanced out by Swardstrom’s histrionics. And the star completely avoids dirtying his hands. And, in a bizarre coincidence (or not), on the same day as his benevolent statement, Edward is appointed United Nations Goodwill Ambassador for Biodiversity. Nothing says “team player” more than the United Effing Nations! Take that, Marvel!

That still leaves us without a Hulk. How about Eric Bana? He’s bound to be cheaper than Edward. Why, I paid him $3 to mow my lawn just last week. Or, if they want to skew younger, I nominate Zac Efron, mainly because I’d like to see him wandering around, dazed, half-naked and clutching his stretchy purple pants.

Marvel had better hurry, though. Comic-Con is next week, and the clock is ticking. Just don’t make Kevin Feige angry. You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry. Just ask Edward Norton. 

Does it feel weird to anyone else that we’re halfway through summer and there are no big crossover events going on right now? Brightest Day? Kind of. Return of Bruce Wayne? Eh. Believe me, I’m not complaining. I’m still wiped out from Blackest Night and Siege and Dazzler. I plan to enjoy this calm before whatever storm is next. How about you? Be sure to let us know what you’re reading, either in the Comics Forum or right here in the comments section. Now, on with the Load!

The Amazing Spider-Man #636 Somehow, between moving, traveling and generally not paying attention, I missed the first two issues of this “Grim Hunt” story arc. And I haven’t been able to find them. So, if someone out there could bring me up to speed on this whole resurrection business, I’d be most grateful. More importantly, though, have I missed any of Evil Aunt May’s wicked bons mots? Please, please don’t tell me she’s been cured.

Avengers: The Children’s Crusade #1 I’m trying to imagine how powerful it would have been for me, as a kid, to see the beautiful moment of love and tenderness between Wiccan and Hulkling in this issue. They get interrupted, of course, before any actual kissing occurs, but it’s still a gorgeous moment and a gorgeous piece of art. It’s hard to imagine the same company that’s publishing Rawhide Kid is also publishing this.

Batman and Robin #13 Oh ho, that Damian. You’ve got to watch the little scamp every second or he might just pick up a crowbar and end 60 years of the Joker’s tyranny with one blow to the temple. Either Damian is going to make an enemy for life out of this, or the Joker’s going to walk away from this actually afraid of Robin. Either way should add a little more drama to the mix, don’t you think?

The Boys #44 The Hughie/Annie thing has been going on for months now and probably could have gone on for several more. It was high time to move this plot forward, though, so I’m glad we get a really strong issue, with a great unexpected twist at the end.

Brightest Day #5 I kind of like that Brightest Day has turned into a soap opera about the lives and loves and dead straight people. I’ve only ever found living straight people to be mildly interesting, so I’m glad they’ve thrown some reanimated corpses into the mix to liven things up a bit. Aquaman and Mera and Hawkman and Hawkgirl share some passionate kisses and shocking revelations, while Boston Brand and friends hang out in the cemetery (because no one got enough of that during Blackest Night). I can’t wait to see what these crazy kids get up to next!

Rawhide Kid: The Sensational Seven #2 There’s a page in this issue, where the Kid and Sheriff Seth share an awkward moment, recalling a brief affair, that actually feels somewhat genuine and hints at a much more interesting story than the one being told. Before you get too excited, though, I should point at that another character is gagging in the background and Sheriff Seth gets gunned down by friendly fire on the next page, eliciting exactly no response from the Kid. I read and re-read those pages several times, trying to figure out if I missed something, then closed the book and officially moved on with my life. I suggest everyone else do the same.

Red Hood: The Lost Days #2 I suppose it’s a bad thing that I find myself identifying with Jason Todd. Is it his status as the ultimate outsider? Heck, even Dick implies he’s the Jan Brady of the Bat family. Or maybe I just like whackjobs yearning for redemption. Whatever the case, I’m hoping Jasonpalooza carries on for a while, because he makes for a great thorn in Dick’s side and a constant reminder of the dark side of the Dark Knight.

Red Robin #14 We get a second helping of Damian this week! In this issue, Tim wisely puts him on a list of supers who may need to be taken out at some point. This doesn’t sit well with the little tyke at all. Luckily Big Daddy/Big Brother Dick shows up to keep everyone in line. The dynamics between all the Bat boys are a lot of fun. Throw Jason into the mix, and you’ve got a house full of psychologically damaged folks, all seeking attention. It’s like a season of Big Brother. Just wait until crazy-ass Bruce gets back!

That’s it for this week, kids! Happy reading!